Sexperts tout erotic image training as the secret to a beautiful mind
Sex advisors for women have recently changed tack, going from counseling about detailed techniques such as how to achieve orgasm, to recommending they carry out some erotic image training, according to Spa! (9/25).
Advisors in publications like the recently released sex manual "Girl's Side Book" by the intriguingly-monikered "Pink Sensei" are offering detailed advice on the steps women need to take to imagine what a romp would be like before it happens, then how to make that fantasy materialize.
"Women are telling me things like how the advice has been like discovering a new treasure, or it has taught them lessons even though they're over 30," Pink Sensei tells Spa! "It's really a thrill to get this kind of feedback."
Among the steps women are taking include preparing their panties for even bland occasions just to remind them of their own femininity and eroticism.
"I always get by myself and put on some racy undies and check out myself and my sexiness," a 31-year-old woman says. "It gives me some peace of mind."
Others undergo erotic image training by practicing moans or "orgasm faces."
"I've got a recording of my bedroom moans," one 25-year-old woman says.
Another woman, two years older, adds: "I masturbate in front of a mirror so I can practice the kind of face I want to put on when I'm having an orgasm."
Kaoru Ogiwara, operator of women's online sex aid store Lovely Pop, thinks the onus now being placed on women giving themselves a sensual mental workout is a natural progression.
"There's been this trend for years about advising women on what they need to do to make themselves popular with men. They get all this advice about external issues, like the kind of clothes they should wear to be attractive and the kind of things they should do that will make them appealing. But they've been given so much advice of this type, there isn't anything more that they can be told," Ogiwara tells Spa! "Now, I believe women are thinking to themselves, 'We know all about the external issues, so now let's get real and work on getting erotic on the inside.'"
Pink Sensei is on the front lines of the quiet revolution.
"There are still loads and loads of women who think sex is something that only guys should take the lead in. I wrote ('Girl's Side Book') for those women who think there's something wrong about actively enjoying sex, or that sex is bad, or shameful," she says. "If you leave the tempo of sex up to a partner, there are going to be a lot of times when you're left unsatisfied. So, I say, do bit of mental preparation beforehand and go out on your own to make sure you have a bit of fun in the sack."
Pink Sensei argues that men should not feel threatened by more sexually assertive women, but instead embrace them -- literally.
"Women who don't do erotic image training are entirely dependant on what their guys give them. If he's got an amazing technique, that's fine. But if he's small, or too thin, or stinks, or has some other flaw, no matter how trifling, thinking about it can stop you from feeling good with him," the writer tells Spa! "Women who do go through erotic image training, on the other hand, know how to enjoy what's right before their eyes, they know what it takes to make them feel good, and they tend to have a more positive outlook about what's going on." (By Ryann Connell)